The Holiday Journey: Love, Caregiving, and the Road Less Traveled
The holidays often stir up the desire to gather with family, share traditions, and create memories. But for those of us who care for aging or disabled loved ones, the idea of holiday travel can feel less like a gift and more like a complicated puzzle. Last year, my dad and I decided to travel together for Christmas. But what started as a simple plan soon unfolded into a series of logistical challenges, unexpected complications, and moments of realization.
Packing and Preparing: The Hidden Layers of Travel
At first, the preparations seemed manageable—snacks packed, medications organized, wheelchair assistance requested. But then, the other considerations began to surface. Traveling with a loved one who requires care isn’t as simple as packing a bag and heading to the airport. There’s the wheelchair line that feels endless, the frustration of navigating crowded spaces, and the stress of balancing caregiving with the normal stress of air travel.
And just when you think you’re ready to board, something unexpected happens. For me, it was when Dad needed the restroom right as we were about to board the plane. There I was, juggling his coat, our carry-on, and his hat (which, of course, couldn’t touch the floor 🙃), all while listening to the boarding announcement: “Final boarding for Flight 234 to Denver.”
It felt like a race against time, and I had to decide: Is this trip worth all the hassle?
The Question We All Ask: Is It Worth It?
Holidays are supposed to be about presence, not just presents. The idea of spending time with family sounds beautiful—until the travel logistics hit home. The challenges aren’t just about navigating the airport or managing medical needs on the road. They go much deeper. For example, what about the comfort of being at home? Dad sleeps in his own bed, and he knows exactly where everything is. In the middle of the night, he can get to the bathroom without needing assistance, making those moments feel less daunting. At home, the routine feels easier, less taxing.
But when we travel, those comforts are temporarily lost. And while the idea of spending the holidays with family is heartwarming, it comes with its own set of sacrifices—comfort, familiarity, and peace of mind being among them.
When Staying Home Might Be the Best Option
Sometimes, staying home is the most meaningful journey of all. After all, home isn’t just a place—it’s where care feels familiar. It’s where your loved one sleeps in their own bed and can navigate their space comfortably. Travel, no matter how well-planned, often disrupts those small, meaningful routines. And in the case of caregiving, those disruptions can carry a weight that’s easy to overlook until you’re in the thick of it.
So, when the logistics feel overwhelming, and the destination seems far out of reach, it’s okay to ask: is this worth it?
Balancing the Journey and the Destination
The truth is, there’s no right answer. Sometimes, the best choice is to stay home, surrounded by the comforts of routine. Other times, you might decide that the time with family—despite the challenges—is worth the effort. It all comes down to love. Love motivates the journey, whether it’s across the country or just across town.
But it’s important to recognize that caregiving, especially around the holidays, often involves sacrifices. Traveling may take you away from the comforts of home, but it also offers the opportunity to create precious memories with the ones you love.
What I’ve Learned: A Caregiver’s Travel Tips
If you do choose to travel, here are a few tips I’ve learned along the way to make things a little easier:
- Pack light: When you’re caring for someone else, every ounce counts. Keep things simple and light.
- Build in extra time: Whether it’s for bathroom breaks, assistance with luggage, or simply needing a moment to breathe, allow yourself more time than you think you’ll need.
- Keep essentials handy: Snacks, medications, and comfort items like a favorite blanket or pillow can make all the difference.
- Ask for help: You might be surprised by how much support you can get from others—flight attendants, airport staff, or fellow travelers.
- Stay flexible: Not everything will go as planned, but try to embrace the journey, even when it takes unexpected turns.
Final Thoughts: What Matters Most
Caregiving during the holidays is complex, filled with decisions, challenges, and moments of uncertainty. Whether you decide to travel or stay home, what matters most is that the decision is made with intention. The holidays are about connection and love, and sometimes, that connection is found in the simplest of choices—whether it’s making a trip to be with family or choosing to stay in a place where you and your loved one can feel at peace.
In the end, the journey isn’t just about the destination—it’s about how we navigate the road together. ❤️
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