The Caregiver Lifestyle

The Caregiver Lifestyle blog is about my journey as a caregiver.  The main goal of the blog is to emphasize the importance of self-care.  It is reminder to caregivers to love themselves as much as they love those in their care.  It is based on the belief that caregivers need to put the mask on themselves first.  When traveling on an aircraft, travelers are urged, if faced with a loss of cabin pressure, to put the mask on themselves first then attend to the needs of those traveling with them.  This advice is important to Caregivers as well.  This advice takes the form of self-care. 

The Caregiver Lifestyle defines self-care as practices and habits for optimum health and wellness.  It explores ways to stay healthy through diet and exercise, meditation and mindfulness.  Self-care also includes a spiritual practice.

The Big Decision

I always knew a day would come when a decision regarding caring for my Dad would have to be made.  My dad was approaching his early 90’s and at the time, did not need live in support.  The challenge was the question regarding where would he live? Neither of us liked the idea of having to relocate. Additionally, what would being a caregiver entail.  My dad is a very private person and was not comfortable with the idea of strangers coming into his home on an ongoing basis.  Furthermore, Dad’s motto about aging is that old age is not for wimps.  To that end, he always been physically active.  He was known in his community for his dedication to walking, riding his bike, mowing his lawn and doing chores around his home.  He would never pay for repairs if he could so them himself.  He continued to do so until he reached his 92nd birthday. In addition to exercise, nutrition played an important part in his life.  He studied food labels as if studying for an advanced college degree.  He collected books, and magazine and articles and read extensively on the subject.  Following in my father’s footsteps, the amount of information we collected could serve as course material on both topics.  Later, we would extend our informal study on aging to include wellness and well-being. 

In addition to the health and wellness aspects of his adventures into old age, my dad took care of all aspects of independent living. Durable power of attorney and beneficiary forms were completed, property transferred and all aspects of his financial health addressed.  Since Dad had always been proactive, it appeared that nothing would change. It looked as if I could “manage his care afar” and we spoke by phone daily as often as four or five times. 

However, I could not ignore the fact that things would change and would need to change.  The question was how soon?  The “how soon” question became a source of much stress and anxiety.  Things were stressful because we had lived independently since I was 18 years old.  While “close” and did share similar interests, we had opposing opinions on most things. Dad is a loner and prefers being alone; he does not like company.  Any movement in his space, not of his own making, is aggravating to him. He is picky and opinionated.  Sharing a space would be irritating to both parties.  The fact that at some point this would be a reality triggered a level of depression and anxiety I had never experienced before.  A decision would need to be made and soon.

My journey into caregiving began in November 2020 during the pandemic.  The journey began with a routine phone call.  The call found my dad lying on the floor trying to pick himself up.

The Caregiver Lifestyle Blog is my story as a newbie caregiver.  It is about the fact that as a caregiver I was devoting all of my energies to the role.  I neglected my own needs and soon experienced many of the pain points common to caregivers.  Nutritional supplements, increased exercise and practices rooted in mindfulness and spirituality help support my health and wellbeing.   

I invite you to join in my journey into wellness and wellbeing as a caregiver. Together we will explore strategies to overcome the pain points of caregiving, including:

  • Increasing anxiety and depression
  • Increased sleeplessness
  • Irritability
  • Fear, doubt, worry, overwhelmed
  • Fatigue and exhaustion
  • Time management
  • Lack of privacy

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